A Quick Guide of Mumbai (Part 1)

So you're new to Mumbai, eh?
Quite the overwhelming state of affairs you must've been presented with.

How do you make any sense of this mayhem?
That's precisely what I'm here to talk about.

To live in Mumbai, you need to understand Mumbai.
A map is often the best way to learn about a new city -

Map of Mumbai, Courtesy mapofindia.com

As can be observed, Mumbai is a Linear city with Vashi as an offshoot.

It comprises of majorly 4 districts -

• Mumbai District
• Thane District (Includes Vashi too)
• Kalyan District (Not shown on map. Kalyan is another offshoot of Mumbai)
• Palghar District

Mumbai (erstwhile Bombay) is named after the Mumba Devi and has a tremendous historic significance. The Portuguese and the Britishers had their major bases in Mumbai. The Handicraft and Cotton industry was based out of Mumbai and Gujarat. In fact, Mumbai was then called the "Manchester of India" for its good quality Handloom exports. Apart from these, the first few Bollywood Movies were also created, directed, and produced in Mumbai.
Over the time, Mumbai has also become the Financial Capital of India, housing the BSE at the famous Dalal Street.
So, overall, Mumbai has been playing a major role in India's life and is a major component of the Indian Machinery.

While Politically Mumbai maybe divided into districts, the division that everyone uses here is the division based on direction

Mumbai is divided into -

• South Mumbai - Called SoBo (South Bombay) or Town and extends from Colaba to Mahim in the West and Sion in the North. In short, any place where NO Rickshaws ply is called SoBo. The people living here are called Townies. Townies have a different version of "Bombay" where it ends at Lower Parel or Dadar. The best of Mumbai is found here, also, the most expensive side of Mumbai is also found here.
• Western Mumbai - Western Suburbs (Burbs). This typically extends throughout the Coastline, starting from Bandra and ending around Borivali. The people living here are called Burbies. The Burbs are a happening place where there's always something to do or a Bollywood start to see. Burbs are also posh and hence expensive. (Soon to be) Old Airport is here.
• Northern Mumbai - Typically starts from Sion and heads towards Thane (It is Mulund, politically, but people prefer to choose Thane as the end point). Most Companies have their offices located in this region, notably at Vikhroli and Powai. Though the North is not considered as cool as the South or the West, there are plenty of reasons to love North. Powai is the home of the IIT, home of the splendid Hiranandani Complex and also of the Powai Lake.
  Likewise, Thane is an immensely thriving part of Mumbai where you've got amazing infrastructure and opportunities.
• Harbour Mumbai - "East Mumbai? Mumbai kya Pakistan hai kya?" said one townie girl who was asked why we don't have an East Mumbai. Harbour Mumbai is the region beyond Mankhurd (Bhabha Atomic Research Centre - BARC) towards Panvel.
  This side hosts Navi Mumbai or Vashi, the world's biggest planned city. A Vashiwala generally never leaves Vashi as life is self-sustaining over there. As this side is still up and coming, living here is relatively cheap, though make no mistakes, you do find really well do to people staying here. (Soon to be) New Airport is here.

With that sorted, you'll probably want to know where exactly to stay!
This, my reader, is not an easy question to answer.
But here's an attempt.

The Categories -

•  I’m Filthy Rich - Rent can be anywhere from 15000 to 30000 per month for a 2 BHK depending on the location and locality.

1. Colaba – Extremely expensive place. Houses cost 4 crore or more for a 2 BHK.
2. Worli – Cheaper than Colaba but still quite expensive as it is a posh area. This is a good place to rent offices though.
3. Bandra – Close Proximity to Bollywood stars and the lack of space ensure the rates here are extremely high. A good way to avoid the high rates is to look for a PG (Paying Guest) accommodation.
4. Thane – Lot of money has been pumped in its infrastructural development and with offices shifting to Thane, rates have increased.
5. Marine Lines – Being close to the sea (check the picture) and a highly frequented location, the rates are quite high here. If money isn’t a hassle, it is quite a place to live in.
6. Powai – Hiranandani Estate, Powai Lake, IIT-B, Office Spaces, etc. This place is bound to be expensive.

• I can spare enough – Rent can be anywhere from 8000 to 15000 per month for a 2BHK depending on the location and locality

1. Dadar – Heart of the City. Located bang in the middle of the city and extremely convenient with respect to transportation. Located here is Shivaji Park, the place where Tendulkar learned his game, and also the Parsi Colony (allegedly Farookh Balsara, ie, Freddie Mercury of Queen was born here). Staying here will be expensive, but life here will be very easy. For Political reasons, people from UP and Bihar will do better to avoid this place though.
2. Santacruz – Stuck between Andheri and Bandra, this niche of a place offers a mixture of convenience and fun. It is quite close to the airport too.
3. Borivali – Quite close to the North-West of Mumbai, Borivali has the Essel World-Water Kingdom Theme Park and the Beach around it. It doesn’t offer a lot of convenience but rent will be on the lesser side.
4. Ghatkopar/Vikhroli – Generally called Gujju Land since majority living here are Gujaratis, it also has lots of offices around it. There is still a high chance you’ll get a good deal for yourself for a place to stay.
5. BKC (Bandra Kurla Complex) – The area between Bandra and Kurla was made into a commercial cum residential space and many offices and embassies are located here. While the rates might be cheap, transportation is an issue and rickshaw rides will eat a lot out of your wallet.

• I’m generally broke man – Rent anywhere between 3000 to 8000 per month for a 2BHK depending on the location and locality

1. Dharavi – House of the biggest slum in the world, you’ll be greeted to many foreign women looking after the poor kids as part of their bid to “improving the world”. Jugaad is done here. This place offers most convenience in this sublist as it is close to Sion and Kurla and to Bandra and Mahim. Slumdog Millionaire was shot here.
2. Antop Hill – A place most people don’t know of and is located quite close to Sion and Matunga. Should be cheap but transportation might be a problem.
3. Virar – Far up in the North, Virar is around an hour from Mumbai and the birthplace of Govinda (Chote Miya). Travel will be the problem, so might be the locality. Locals will be full, always.
4. Kalyan – Kalyan is to Northern Mumbai what Virar is to Western Mumbai. Kalyan is slightly more developed as it falls in the path to Pune and Nashik. Travel will be the problem.
5. Chembur – On the higher side of the range, but convenience factor makes up for the rates. Decent place to live at.

• I’m absolutely broke. No Money. Here to Pursue my Rags to Riches Dream – Rent anywhere between 100 – 3000 per month.

1. BDD Chawl, Parel – Deep within the maze that is Parel (Not Lower Parel) lies the BDD Chawl. Tiny houses, cramped up roads and eternal confusion will be your constant accompaniment.
2. Railway Stations – A return ticket of a local costs a minimum of 10 Rs a day or a month long pass costs 130 Rs a month. While this isn’t the ideal place to stay at night, people have done it before and then went on to become big (Mika, Nawazuddin Siddique, etc).
3. Ulhasnagar – Though a place of contradictions, it is a posh area yet a poor area which is far away from the city and the rent is bound to be very less. 

This is Part 1 of a series of posts that I'll be making in order to explain this amazing city in easy, understandable terms. I'll also be updating the existing posts and add new content and images.

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Cheers!
:D